Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Jokes That Have Never Produced Laughter

Big Frank has been reading John Hodgman's "The Areas of My Expertise". This book is really a book of lies, but interesting ones. Hogman states in the introduction: "Truth may be stranger than fiction, goes the old saw, but it is never as strange as lies. (Or for that matter, as true.) Proof of which maxim is the fact that I just made it up." In this amazing book Hogman includes matters historical, literary, cryptozoological, and much on hoboes, food, drink, squirrels, lobster, eels, haircuts, and what lots of information on what happens in the future.

One of Big Frank's favorite chapters is on jokes that nobody laughs at. Here is one that Hogman includes:

"A Duck goes into a pharmacy. He says to the pharmacist, "I need some ointment for my beak. It is very chapped. The pharmacist says, "We have nothin for ducks here."

Big Frank encourages you, kind reader, to tell this to your friends and check it out for yourself; it will not produce laughter. Big Frank also encourages you to write your own - it is not difficult. Here's one of Big Frank's own: "A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi orders a beer and is served. The priest orders a glass of wine and is served. The minister orders a whiskey, and the bartender tells him, 'We don't serve whisky'.

3 comments:

Gina said...

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Gina.
Gina who?
Gina Patterson.

Oh and my all time favorite...
Why is a cat's tail like a long journey?
Because it's fuuur to the very end.
;-)

Big Frank Dickinson said...

Hey Gina,
That first one is definitely not going to produce laughter - totally in the groove. However, the second is laughter producing - big time!

Big Frank

Mike said...

How about this classic:

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: I don't know.