Inconvenient Thoughts

Inconvenient Thoughts
---- Big Frank Dickinson

Like uninvited guests they come;
Evict them as many times as you will
They'll be back and what makes you feel so dumb
Is the fact that you listen with interest to their swill.

The belief, conviction, holy urge
That she who sits inside your heart today;
Though hers is closed, and you've been purged
Will recant, return, and with you always stay.

The never ending search for that day,
The pages of the calendar flip ahead
January, February, March, . . .May -
Towards not now, but the future instead.

This is what you're gonna do, gonna do,
Gonna do; see the end, the accolades;
Then the delay, today, tomorrow too,
Still the thought it says and overpersuades.

It all happens for a reason, oh yeah,
And the reason is a good one too;
The shit you're in's not crap - naah,
In truth of fact it's heavenly do-do.

I'm a special person uniquely different
From all the rest who seem so terribly alike;
And yet their lack of praise I do lament;
Much as shining stars to a northern pike.

All I know is living now, life, awareness,
And the feeling in my hands, warmth of my breath,
But gnawing at my bones is the unfairness
Of what I'm told awaits me: certain death.